Seasons. We either hate or love the seasons that pass through our life, and that’s the reality we often forget…seasons are temporary. Here I sit on the 1st of November reflecting on season of my life that came to an end. While writing out her good-bye card I lost it, a sense of grief overcame my soul & I sat and sobbed at the kitchen table. I reflected back at our memories & thankfulness swelled my heart. I realized in that moment– how much she has meant to me over the years…specifically the past 3.
On our own Adventure Branden and I moved to Oregon 5.5 years ago, leaving behind all our friends and family in Spokane, but my Aunt Susan and her family were my only family here locally. During the last 3 years of some very hard circumstance my Aunt stood beside me and breathed life into my dry bones. When I couldn’t take one more step, she held me hand & cheered my on. She sat with me many afternoons in my worst, praying for, crying with and loving me. The last 3 years have been some of the hardest moments of my life & she became my mom-away-from-mom. She filled the gap when my mom couldn’t physically be here. When I would go through another failed fertility treatment & felt defeated she would take me out for Red Robin fries and listen to my heart, when my dog died she was showed up on my porch to clean my house, when I was overwhelmed with selling my house last year she stood with my in my kitchen and packed boxes while I cried, & in the holidays when we would be alone–we celebrated them together. Through the last years she has loved me and served me with Christ’s love. She has given me strength when I felt I couldn’t do it any more.
This season is now coming to a close & I cannot be more excited for her & her new adventure. Though my heart is heavy today–in my reflections of the past few years, my heart is also overflowing with thankfulness. Thankful that God placed her in my life in a season where I desperately needed her. I am incredibly thankful for the last 5 years together in Oregon, where God knit our hearts together.
Yesterday afternoon I met with my Aunt one last time for lunch & then helped her pack up her last few boxes before loading up the moving truck. This morning she & my uncle said good-bye to Portland and are embarking on a new journey to Phoenix, Arizona. Her and I had many conversations about faith, stepping out, adventure, and risk. Last week I sent her this quote by CS Lewis I found online. Far to many of us would rather sit in holding our comforts with a tight fist than live by faith for what’s ahead–fear usually directs our motives rather than faith. We forget, wherever we go, He is there. We need hearts abandoned, willing & obedient for where He’s called us for this moment of life.
“This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9